Wintered Debts

Can't survive another comedown day
When my spirit houses so much pain
So much bitterness, so much bitternessI need to teach myself to feel again
Somehow I lost the thread of being human
Wrapped up in this bitterness, too much bitternessI'm so confused, what is the function of this ego sickness?
Uselessly believe in myself hatred whisperings
I can't deal with mourning at the carcass/caucus of my failures any longerSlipping on my own vomit
While tried to call you from a bathroom in Sao Paulo,
But I was too drunk to formulate any sort of earthy language, so much bitterness
Too much bitternessOther people can say there is a true belief system
But all my life I've been betrayed by my mother's religion
So much bitterness, too much bitternessI'm so destroyed what is the purpose of this ego sickness?
Uselessly deceived myself by virgin whisperings
And I can't deal with mourning at the carcass/caucus of my failures any longer
Any longerCan't seem to get the saddle
On the spoils of this morbid fugueMy mantras of subhuman nature, just a veil for all elation
The ink's dripping all over me
The only regret I have is caring
Are we posing? Are we props
Riding the anger `till it stops?Father, will we starve today? Father will we starve?
Father, will we starve today? Father will we starve?No my child, there are wild women in here and a crafty fish am I
No my child, there are wild women in here and a fleshy catch am IWill our quarters be the sunken earth deep beneath the meadow?
Will our quarters be the sunken earth deep beneath the ground?No my child, you lay your head upon an ousted (?) felon
No my child, you rest your head upon a gross misdeedFather, Will a ??? of curse enough to find me
Father, Will a ??? a fictim who abuseNo my child ??? distunction
??? is a symbol of delightIt's hard to sympathize with those that won't fight for themselves
I can't hold both our faces off the flames much longer
The child of our struggle is free
I've fallen out of love with the prisoner
That's to save us